I know you say most men are marriage-minded underneath but they seem much less interested in getting into a stable, committed relationship than women do, and seem to drag their heels.
Some of the things I hate about being single are (in no particular order): lack of love, affection and emotional support; not having someone to go on vacation with; not having someone to share domestic tasks with; being excluded from social gatherings because I don’t have a partner; not having someone to talk to at home on a day to day basis; having to cope with the financial burden of being single (apartment, bills etc.); not having a regular source of quality sex available.
Why aren’t they just as keen as we are to know “where things are going” early on in the relationship? I particularly love your list of what sucks about being single.
A lot of men my age seem uninterested in a committed relationship, seeming to prefer a more casual “low investment, low return” approach to relationships. As a guy who was single for 35 years, I completely agree and think that – all things remaining equal – having a good relationship is a far superior state of being than being alone.(This does not mean that I look down on single people or think you should be in an unsatisfying relationship so, please, spare me the complaints.)But what gets me the most excited, Elaine, is that you’ve forced me to consider something that I’ve never actually considered before: Why Don’t Men Hate Being Single As Much as Women Do?
I feel like since my separation two years ago, I’ve finally come into my own. What if I told you that these dudes are responsible for their own feelings and the consequences of them? As a former 16-year-old diner waitress with a lot of charisma and a big mouth who needed to thread the needle of keeping customers happy and not lose my job while also not wanting to put up with constant bullshit, here are some strategies that I’ve had luck with when faced with the North American Jocular-But-Creepy Old Man: Step 1 for all of these: Research other contractors. You don’t want to have to fire him, but you absolutely can, and you should remind yourself of that.